What Am I Here For?

I know, I know...I am in rare form posting twice on a Monday. But I am in inner turmoil as to what I am supposed to be doing with myself. If you know anything about signs then you know that Pisces are the most creative. I am a pisces in case you didnt know. I feel stifled creatively in my job but i have no idea what I want to do. This is also a trait of the Pisces...indecisveness. I like so many things...music, movies, people, arts and crafts...everything. I used to want to be an actress but I'm not willing to be someone's roommate in LA/NY, waitressing until im 30 while I wait for my big break.

I think thats the reason why I haven't started my own company or written the book that i was talkin about bc im scared of failure. Scared I wont be successful or somethin.

-By the way, this is extremely hard for me to admit. I dont like to admit that I am scared to do anything. I dont even know if this blog is gonna make it to being posted...i guess we'll see =/-

I need to make a decision though because I'm tired of doin this dumbass finance/procurement job. Its runnin me ragged and its not fun. Its only makin the ends meet....

excuse me while i go post my resume on monster,

pink.

OH HAPPY DAY!!!!

*singin like ol' dude on Sister Act...yes, I am hitting the high note*

Yes, Yes, Yesssssss! My Boss is going to Puerto Rico tomorrow!!! Holy tartar sauce, yall have NO idea how tired I am...so tomorrow i am sleeping in, honey! I was so tired this morning that my alarm went off at 545 am and i hit the 10 minute snooze until 7 am. I just couldnt get myself together...not to mention the power is out in my bedroom and bathroom...ONLY in my bedroom and bathroom tho, as in, the lights and power in the rest of my apartment is fine. WTH?! I had such a hard time wrappin my hair in the dark last night that i almost (almost) cut it off.

But anyway...my bossll be gone til monday!! then hes back on Tuesday, and then hell be in Pennsylvania til the end of hot damn month!!!! If i can get some decent sleep in between now and wed-nes-day (say it just like i wrote it) then ill be hittin the club with Candy and Cass for part deux of her Bornday Extravaganza!! If not then ill be catchin Zzzzz's that night. Ill be sure to let you guys know tho.

Why was i on the metro this mornin and i seen this thug lookin ass nigga bobbin his head to his ipod. I automatically assume he listenin to slim thug or some shit. I get closer bc the metro was PACKED and this fool is listenin to Mariah Carey's Always Be My Baby...somethin aint right bout that...im just sayin.

Just thought i'd leave yall wit that,

pink.

All By My Lonesome

Its Tuesday!! And that means that since todays almost over...i get paid in one more day...and then again on Friday!! You like how i rationalized that one right? Anyway...todays post is about me being lonely...i dont like to be lonely. Although i love my apartment and being able to clean or not clean when i want...i want some company!!! So ive com to the conclusion that im getting a pet! Although i dont know which one i want. im tryna choose between a dog and some fish. lol i know they are at opposite sides of the spectrum...but heres my reasoning...

DOG...if i get a dog i want a puppy. Mature dogs come with their own issues. oike they only like to be bothered between 6-9 pm and i refuse to let a damn animal decide when i want to pay them attention. or they have been abused or somethin else crazy. i want a puppy that i can mold into what i want and name him the name that i want. (im thinkin Dolce, Bella or Honey...what do you think about those?) dogs can show you when they are happy and excited and sad and angry. they run up to you when you come home and snuggle up wit you at night. The down side to a puppy is that i dont really have time to train one. im usually at work between 8 am and 10 pm with the exception of like 2 days outta the week. puppys require LOTS of attention that i dont really have...although i have looked into the option of crate training her. so those are the pros and cons of a wittle doggie. and i do mean little. like a teacup yorkie. i even saw the coach collar to put around her neck...awwwwww =)

FISH...ummm there really isnt anything to say about them. they blow bubbles. thats about it. i guess they are pretty to look at. but they are boring. however they dont require the maintenance that my teacup yorkie would. thats all i have to say about fish. i sooooo want my doggie.

*Sidenote that has nothin to do with this post* I just got recognized at my job for bringin in 1 million dollars worth of invoices on the 5.2 million dollar quarterly closeout!!!!!!! i know that prolly doesnt mean anything or make sense to yall but thats a big deal!!

So tired...so so tired

At first i couldnt think of what to blog to you guys about. But what better than how tired i am!! I feel so out of control right now. I am workin a 75 hour week between 2 jobs and i just cant fathom how im gonna do this. im only on day 3!! i have 5 more days to go. i woke up so late for work this mornin but i was too tired to even care...lol. i looked at the clock, saw that it was 903 and thought to myself....fuck it. shit happens. no matter how much i rushed, i was gonna be late. so i didnt. i turned on Daddys little girls and went on about my normal routine. it is what it is ya know?

If things were sailing smoothly at my pt job i think i would be fine. but its not. we have gotten a shipment of over 120 boxes in 2 days and we have the Summer Sale comin up (Come see us at The Body Shop Pentagon City!! we need to get some of this shit outta here!! lol) and we are tryna find a place to put all the stuff. Baisically Im in charge of the setup bc our full time assistant manager is off for sun and fun and a fashion design internship in ITALIA *lucky bitch! lol* and my store manager is off to Philly for a week to a much needed visit to her family. I know that once this sale is officially started thingsll be alot better but im feelin like i cant see the light at the end of the tunnel.

also...i dont know if yall know....BUT I HATE MY FULL TIME JOB!! someone get me outta here, seriously...i beg of you. my job in general is hell....workin in the pentagon is hell. I think that makes me feel even more tired than i am bc i hate comin in here every mornin. but instead of complainin i need to really just start lookin for a different job.

*sidenote* i know this is off topic but i only buy cd's when they are old or after ive heard them a couple times from someone else. but i heard ths song on the radio by a girl named Katy Perry called i kissed a girl...and i love that song lol...and *gasp!* im gonna buy the cd when it comes out June 17th.

now let me finish my coke so i can NOT fall asleep at my desk,

pink.

Absence makes the heart grow fonder...

Okay...so in all the time that i havent posted, alot of things have happened...i have given up my apartment and i have a roommate. I moved from Ft. Washington to NE, DC, which doesnt sound that far (it's not) but now i dont have the privacy of my own apartment to cuddle wit my Pookie or even just fuck him when i want to. On top of that...he's been workin these 80 hour weeks...which doesnt leave time for much of a sex life anyway. Which Brings me to my point:

I AM MISSIN MY BOYFRIEND YALL!!

We havent been able to spend a decent weekend away since i dont know when. This summer was very mundane, with all the arguin that we were doin, so we didnt do anything. Now that we are good and gravy, he's been extra busy wit work and stuff. I know some of yall prolly think im trippin... i mean he is only 21, he's a foreman for a construction company that he works damn hard for....and he's about his money. And dont get me wrong...i DEFINITELY appreciate that. but when he's workin so much that we dont ever have a chance to just see each other, i wonder if all that is worth it. Youll hear women say: Oh! money isnt everything...blah blah blah...but for me it aint. If my man made 6 figz but i never saw him bc he was on business trips all the time i would not be happy. I need time, affection, attention...those kinds of things. We talk all the time while im at work...well text each other via sidekick and we send pics to each other...but after awhile that isnt an adequate substitute for some good ole bun time. I try not to complain to him too much...other than tellin him that i miss him all the time (to which he returns the sentiment). Plus i kno that it is likely that things will slow down since winter is fast approachin and he does construction work. Maybe well plan a weekend getaway to AC or somethin...once his hours slow down. I wanna go away for christmas or thanksgivin...but THAT he is NOT havin...he's a family man...gotta be wit the fam...

Anyway...hadda get that off my chest. If we do somethin anytime soon ill be sure to post about it. Now lemme do some work! lol...

Random thoughts...

Okay. So i watched Baldwin Hills last night. And i just dont understand why BET is so corny and low budget! Baldwin Hills compared to The Hills and Laguna Beach is just dumb and has no point. But if im up next Tuesday ill watch it again...however...mtv needa get on they grind and put out another Hills...ya dig?

Ive decided to go to school...full time. Dont ask me where or when im goin...well i know when and where actually...Norfolk State and im movin in December. Wish me luck cuz the BF is comin too...

I wonder why girls who are talkin to guys are intimidated by the female friend....i dont get it. Ive invited her to lunch wit us (against his will) just so that she would know that i DEFINITELY do not want his ass...but instead of accepting the invitation or even speakin to me when she sees us together, she would rather give him a 100 question quiz on me. Just dont understand that.

I havent been in the mood to work lately...dont know why but i come in and surf the net all day. I get bored of jobs easily, ask anyone who knows me and im sure theyll tell that ive worked almost everywhere...lol. Guess you could say im a "Jane of all trades" ha ha!

Who knew that KRS-One's 23 yr old son committed suicide? Who knew he hadda son? not me. But my condolences go out to his family. He was goin on 24 this week...